Grandma Got Stuck in the Window and we Kept the Gifts

Going on two shots of espresso and two large cups of drip coffee. . . great I wonder if I'll explode. I have been building up a tolerance as I get free coffee at my place of business. Not really a good thing considering I tend to work in the eve'n times.

As a rule, during business hours we are required to play Christmas music; this now includes an Alvin and the Chipmunks rendition of "Blue Christmas", "Christmas Comedy" and my personal favorite "Kitten Christmas" which features a chorus of kittens mewing to the classics. It actually sounds more like someone has locked them under the stairs for twelve days and is poking them with a sharp stick. . . ahhh the holidays. Anything to spice up the old classics I suppose. After hours is another story however.

I've got the shakes.

This guy behind me is dominating the conversation. He seems to be the only one talking. Either that or the others are very quiet and slipping their comments in under my radar. His flow of speech seems uninterrupted.

Ive recently decided I am a hat person. I don't own many or even plan to buy any but I am in full support of their existence. I hope my support of this campaign doesn't backfire.

My dad is remodeling his house (well others are) and it is going to be a stretch to get it finished before the Christmas Celebration. Last night he was hanging out in the garage because he can't walk on the floor. When he wanted to go to bed he would climb in the window and only travel from bedroom to bathroom. Basically he's a hobo. "Honey it's time to open gifts! Would you mind coming in through the window? Oh and help your grandmother, she tends to get stuck on the way out!" Good thing Grandma's not comin' this year. . .

I was a GoodWill the other day and I bought a flannel plaid button up shirt (gap kids XL boys section); its for my lumberjack look. My friend insisted on buying this "ornament" which was a person-like creature with wire wiggly antenna, a bug shaped body, wings and a water bottle marked "jitter Juice" More than scary. He hid it in my house. I found it yesterday, I had just gotten up and groggily opened the fridge to find it staring down at me. . . better than coffee. Merry Christmas indeed you sick f*ck that designed this thing, merry Christmas indeed.

Once again my attempt at making my Christmas gifts failed miserably. I never give myself time. 'Oh yeah I can make 12 scarfs in 3 days.' Whatever, I made one and I am proud.















Merry Christmas Blogging Losers and A Happy New Year!

Starfish in wrinkled Frog pajamas

I start at my new place of employment at four of the o'clock this afternoon. I wonder if my inablility to count will negativly affect my performance.

All this week I have filled out evaluations sheets for all my teachers. I hope that they consider my highly informed and truthful opinion with the respect it deserves and fire a quarter of thier staff. Somehow, though they say that these actually matter and the actually will take them into serious concideration, I find this doubtful considering how many students attend who then fill out around 5 each. Whatever, I did give the self professed 'Nazi teacher' the review of her life. I must say I never would have thought that would be a desirable attribute, one with which to introduce youself.

I think I may have a really kickin' Christmas song collection.

I didn't feel like walking to school, so I danced.

Tonight is the night. That makes whatever happens sound v important.

Well, what actually happens is that I get off me bum and go to RICHARD III

put on by my fellow university students.

Apparently it is a rather 'rock' version though
I do not know if that applies to anything but the music.

Rather than allow us to enjoy the theatre I must then on Monday

have a lovely quiz/on what I have seen. "Shut I must pay attention, I am having a quiz" "Whats going on? What's his name? No I cannot relax I MUST know everything! I HAVE A QUIZ!" for 2.5 hours. Oh well, I happen to like 'the Shakespeare.'
I better like it considering I've had a week to memorize and block a scene from Shakespeare for my final. Cha! I better apply what I've 'learned.' (sun salutation, 'walking around the space', finding candy hidden in the room, etc)

Today, it being the week before finals or "dead week" there is some action in the University Center. We must 'stress less' so the kindly beings from above (offices upstairs?) have provided free food (healthy and caffine free o'course), playdough (art releases stress), dogs to pet (see prior reason), stress balls to squeeze (cough), and games to play. Thank you benevolent rulers! I partook in a little peppermint tea and a few strawberries. Nice dogs.

I think I'd like a hamburger.

Actually that sounds good; but latley (not that 'you' care) I have noticed that by default I have become a "fishatarian" because of all the gross chemicals in chicken and beef and the cost of organic by household no longer buys it. I honsestly eat more carb based products any way.

Must toodle I've got a mountian line (lion) to catch.

Tanking in the Moral Department of Sears

I was planning on leaving a longish blog that included all my rants and complements on my artistic styling of my new updated blog but. . .I have just realized that I sat at a computer desk fo a student with a disability. No wonder it was free. *sigh. . .

I hope this doesnt loose me my job

Endymion, supposedly the most beautiful of men, was loved by the Moon, who cast him
into a perpetual sleep that she might descend and embrace him each night.

A lovely if not possesive sentiment. Only to be countered by the horror below.

What Famous Leader are You? Personality tests by simularminds.com

I am not sure what to say. Only that I am sorry.

If the city were a cheese it would be swiss on a waffle

" I want God, want poetry,
I want danger, I want freedom,
I want goodness, I want sin. "
Aldous Huxley

Ah the sleepy passivity of the thanksgiving holiday. We all (or at least most) must awake from it tomorrow groggy and slightly bloated, carting leftover sandwiches for the next few weeks; until Christmas. I must go attend to my homemade granola. That's right.

Robert Bond and the Thanksgiving Shopping Cart of Tofu

I have neglected my bloggy ("wee love you noggy" - fairly odd parents) but with good reason. I am taking care of this woman's house/dog for about five days and I didnt really want to invade thier computer and get online and blog it up. But today I decided to invade inVADE INVADE!!! Oh well its not like I am snooping. Actually one of my favorite things about dog sitting in getting to look in all the cupboards, for some reason looking at what kind of food people buy (and sampleing some) is of great interest to me. Well I am taking care of this really sweet black lab named Robert. Unfortuantly he is basically the most co-dependent creature I have ever personally met (Robert Madison, Madison Robert). He will not eat unless I am standing in the room with him, if I move to go downstairs he stops and must come with me. Also, he has an injured paw so I cannot walk him or play roughly with him so yesterday I was playing a small amount of fetch in the yard at which point I relized he may not have gone to the bathroom the entire time I have been taking care of him as I havent gone outside with him until that point. Wow.
On saturday I went to another play, this one by a theatre troup based here in missoula that travels around the world, they even got rave reviews in NY! The play was called Pushcarts and it was extreamly intense. These people (there were only three in the entire play) were immensly talented. The play was very well done and enjoyable in the way that all extreamly disturbing but talented productions are. (whatever that means). Let me just say it was much more better (thats right!) than the previous production which was lacking at no fault to the actors I might add.
Oh yes, and last night I went to the late showing of Casino Royale. I must comend the actor on his bond but then qualify it with a rowdy (holy crap was that ever the most drug out movie I have ever seen) It was one of those you think, "op, its over, oh wait. . . hang on. . . oh nope. . . oh this has to be the end. . . oh, its not. . .etc. ) The late show especially was a mistake. It was honestly a test of physical endurance to sit through it all, my butt hurt my neck hurt oh man!! If they had ended it in a timley manner I would say it was a pretty good movie but they did not. oh well, someone else paid.
Happy Thanksgiving everyone have some tofurky if your neighbor is a turkey!
(What????????!)

Sing me a song o' grand one!


I saw this set of plays put on by the University. Their author won a Noble Prize for literature (which apparently doesn't happen all that often) and I assumed they would be stellar!(I always try to have a positive outlook though it often comes out the other way)

Well the second in the set was utterly incomprehensible to me. I thought that this may be due to a lack on intelligence or some knowlage to which I was not privy but those exiting the theatre (those that attended by choice. . . .culture by force!. . . ) also were voicing the same questions I was entertaining in my own mind like: "I'm not sure I understood the scene where the silent man beat the blind man to death. . ." "Was that her husband or her father?" Or really to sum it all up: "what the hell?!" Anywho, my drama "teacher" inquired as to what our impressions of these play was. I asked for a little illumination, unfortunately she answered that this particuar playwrite "planted a seed and then let it grow". . . .kkkkkkeeeeeeeyyyyyy.

I am listening to "Hey Big Spender" right now and I imagine that that would be a very entertaining role to play. . . my dream role is of course in "Rocky Horror Picture Show" or what has been deemed the new RHPS, "Reefer Madness" but that's just me.

Grunt Good Food Grunt


I went to the Good Food Store this morning (at least you know what they sell). I got a delicious cup of 'bottomless' coffee (with stevia and soy vanilla creamer yum!) and some wheat free confection (in case all needed to know my exact habits). Well pretty much every time I go I see this guy there. He looks EXACTLY like John Clese (from monty python) though I dont know that John C. would carry a book holder thing (it hold the book at a convienient angle for your reading pleasure) everywhere he goes. J.C. is too cool for that but I must say that this man strikes as startling resemblence to the oh so funny and oh so british comedian.

I was upset resently as I discovered that I really have no passions in my life. I really havent found that thing that makes me happy to do even when its work (music, art etc. ). I have now reconsidered this. It could be that my 'passion' may be learning languages. I have been unable to test this theory as such as I am not taking any (stupid stupid). A BIG unfortuantly is that the school of higher education to which I submit myself has made it quite dificult to even get into a class NEXT semester!! This has frusterated me a great deal and I must storm (yes storm from my computer) in a huff.

Pan, not just bread


My first post will be someone else's words: "To diminish the worth of women, men had to diminish the worth of the moon. They had to drive a wedge between human beings and trees and the beasts and the waters, because trees and beasts and waters are as loyal to the moon as to the sun. They had to drive a wedge between thought and feeling, between the lamplight by which they count the day's earnings and the dark to which or Pan is ever connected." Tom Robbins Jitterbug Perfume.
I promise all my posts will not be so. . . so . . whatever but I was thinking of this and thought I'd share my love of this feminist man. (Tom Robbins and Pan)